Sunday, November 25, 2012

Breathe Out

Did you ever find yourself in a position, a situation, a moment, where you just didn't know what to say? You can feel it crackling in the air, a live thingthis is important, this has meaning!and yet when you reach out to touch it, it slips away. All that's left is the feeling that something precious was lost, even though you don't know what.

And then that moment's past, the person gone...and suddenly the words come.

These are the words written at 2:00AM, the ones I didn't know how to say, but can sing. It's one of those cases, when the person in mind is so simply sad and hopeless, a laugh escapes. It's not joyous, it's hollow. It's breathing out, when you can't even speak. It's caring about someone more than they do for themself...and  having to let go before you get burned, too.

So here's the song I wrote for the words I couldn't say, for people whose names will never be mentioned but that I hope, one day, might listen.

Breathe Out 
my original composition

Breathe out, 
these are the words I caught in the wind 
And I smile, as you cast your net 
and cut my paper wings. 

Once upon a time in a land far ago 
the cold city boy met the wood-bound princess. 
And they'd play in the forest 
'till the moon hung low.
...that was, oh, how many years ago?

And I won't be made guilty for 
decisions I have taken. 
The day you made yours, 
gave me no other option. 

When the concrete's warmer than the bed you're lying in,
too wound up to see the stop signs caving in; 
when the words won't come 
'cause they're the only ones worth saying. 
Breathe out, breathe out, breathe out, 
breathe out, breathe out, breathe out...
when I can't love you. 

It's called 
The mistakes we make on purpose 
for those who hurt us. 
Damaged, the boy reaches out for more
he always wants more, 'till the castle's burnt 
and they're the last two standing...
Good thing he never knew her 
heart was for the taking.


And it's hard to breathe out
when i see you
sinking, wasting, burning
in a fire too late to put out.
But what can I do when you
don't want to know you?
(and I thought I didn't know myself)
Look me in the eye,
tell me you're not high.
What can I do when I'm wanting to know you
and I'm reaching out, reaching out,
but you're not breathing out.


Breathe out,
these are the words I caught in the wind.
And I smile, as you cast your net,
and cut your paper wings...

I started writing this song in the summer, when something happened that came back up during recent events. It wasn't until today that I finished it. I apologize for the lack of visual in the video (the sound quality, too)I'll make a better one soonbut, for now, here it is! What do you think?

Do you have that song? The one that, feeling happy or low, you could just hand to those who ask "are you ok?"...and let it speak the words that you can't? 


  1. yes, I understand. further joys of writing, right? (although I can't be sure if knowing what to say after the moment brings release or merely a different kind of pain)

    you sounded lovely, anyway,

    and I hope that someday you get the chance to explain.

    1. It depends on what the words are...sometimes it's best to just throw them away. Sometimes, you can't - they don't give you a choice, and you have to find some way to live with them.

      thank youuuu! :) and yeah, maybe someday.

  2. That was a very good song. And if means as much to you as you say then don't stop working on it. The sound quality was fine though so don't worry about that for now.

    1. Thank you, that really means so much to me. :)