Breathe Out

Did you ever find yourself in a position, a situation, a moment, where you just didn't know what to say? You can feel it crackling in the air, a live thing―this is important, this has meaning!―and yet when you reach out to touch it, it slips away. All that's left is the feeling that something precious was lost, even though you don't know what.

And then that moment's past, the person gone...and suddenly the words come.

These are the words written at 2:00AM, the ones I didn't know how to say, but can sing. It's one of those cases, when the person in mind is so simply sad and hopeless, a laugh escapes. It's not joyous, it's hollow. It's breathing out, when you can't even speak. It's caring about someone more than they do for themself...and  having to let go before you get burned, too.

So here's the song I wrote for the words I couldn't say, for people whose names will never be mentioned but that I hope, one day, might listen.

Breathe Out 

my original composition

Breathe out, 

these are the words I caught in the wind 

And I smile, as you cast your net 

and cut my paper wings. 

Once upon a time in a land far ago 

the cold city boy met the wood-bound princess. 

And they'd play in the forest 

'till the moon hung low.

...that was, oh, how many years ago?

Pre-Chorus 

And I won't be made guilty for 

decisions I have taken. 

(No)

The day you made yours, 

gave me no other option. 

Chorus 

When the concrete's warmer than the bed you're lying in,

too wound up to see the stop signs caving in; 

when the words won't come 

'cause they're the only ones worth saying. 

Breathe out, breathe out, breathe out, 

breathe out, breathe out, breathe out...

when I can't love you. 

It's called 

The mistakes we make on purpose 

for those who hurt us. 

Damaged, the boy reaches out for more

he always wants more, 'till the castle's burnt 

and they're the last two standing...

Good thing he never knew her 

heart was for the taking.

Pre-Chorus 

Chorus 

And it's hard to breathe out
when i see you

sinking, wasting, burning
in a fire too late to put out.
But what can I do when you
don't want to know you?
(and I thought I didn't know myself)
Look me in the eye,
tell me you're not high.
What can I do when I'm wanting to know you
and I'm reaching out, reaching out,
but you're not breathing out.

Chorus 

Breathe out,
these are the words I caught in the wind.
And I smile, as you cast your net,
and cut your paper wings...

I started writing this song in the summer, when something happened that came back up during recent events. It wasn't until today that I finished it. I apologize for the lack of visual in the video (the sound quality, too)—I'll make a better one soon—but, for now, here it is! What do you think?

Do you have that song? The one that, feeling happy or low, you could just hand to those who ask "are you ok?"...and let it speak the words that you can't?